You all know what it's like to call the customer support number and get some guy in India "hello my name is um Bruce, I am in some place in the middle of asome place called america near you please tell me how I may assist you I am sorry repeat that your scrotum itches is that correct you rub lotion on it is that correct fuck you in the ear is tat correct you hope I die of cancer of the penis is that correct Thank you for calling please fill out the customer survey hello hello."
Well I am at the other end. They call me!
Me: Thank you for calli....
"hellow my name is sahid mumblemumblereallyfast I have a problem with my laptop that has been going on for 1 minute and I cannot do my my work with out it working I need it working right now it was working fine a minute ago and it won't load the porn site I am not supposed to be looking at anyway this is my company computer and I cannot do my work with out an internet connection are you there why havent you fixed the problem please did you say something what did you say I am sorryI cannot understand your accent are you there have you fixed the problem why do I have to wait 4 more minutes for the problem to be fixed I need it fixed now hello hello have we lost the connection I have waited 47 months on hold to speak to the help desk so you must help me now..."
Me: Yes sir, im sorry [asshole. If you would shut the fuck up I could answer a question now and then] for the delay. How may I [bend over for] help you?
We may send you a satisfaction survey your feedback would please our management [but I'd rather you sove it up you're ass].
June 2017 is my 60th birthday. Where did the time go?
My Facebook page is a lot more up to date and inclusive. Follow the link above.